Well, I don't have to tell anyone how nerve-racking something like that can be. I let myself get into a little bit of a state, but then as always, I remembered to fall back on my faith. I had more than a few responsibilities in front of me, so I tried to put it out of my mind. I'm a drama queen first and foremost though, so I knew...in order to get out of that trap, reaching out to someone else is always my only safety net in this world.
I went over to the hospital, signed in at radiology and took my seat in the waiting room. I couldn't help notice the two women sitting alongside me there. Both of them were a bit jaundiced looking and both had lost their hair. I saw them, and they saw me too...both smiled but then both turned their eyes away. I have to admit, it scared me, seeing them both sitting there. But then, my name was called and I made my way down a very long, very white corridor and sat again and waited. House Wives of Orange County was playing up on the screen. It felt surreal, honestly. Like all this was a part of a dream.
I went to the first technologist, and she assured me she saw nothing, but the doctor would just have to check. She then came back for a few more, and that made me even more nervous. She said she'd be right back...but it wasn't her that returned. The next tech that came in was from ultra-sound...I laughed at that point, and I really don't know why. I told her I didn't really want to graduate, I only wanted to go home.
But it was in that time, after she finished with me, and before the doctor came in...that a certain peace came over me, and the words...'it is what is,' started swimming around in my brain. I thought about all the women before me...my mom, my grandmother, my sister, my mother-in-law, and the countless others too. All these women throughout the ages and we haven't beat this still. But mostly I thought about my family.
The doctor came in then, and she said she wanted a first-hand look. She told me not to try to read her face and not to worry she'd tell me the truth right there. I was very, very fortunate, what I had was a cancer scare. She showed me the spot in question and told me it was really nothing to worry about at all.
Yesterday, I learned the real lesson of life...it really is what it is, and no amount of fighting can ever change that at all. I have no power over it, but I sure can treat it like it's my most important treasure. So...yesterday, life's lesson led me right to the Icecream Shop! Life is good! Icecream, babies, laughter...choose your pleasure and live it up to the hilt!
9 comments:
Great piece. I know exactly what you went through!
I am so glad that it was nothing to worry about. Life is good sometimes :)
Glad it was nothing serious, Gael. I've been through that call back, take more pictures, then the Dr. wanting to see for herself, followed by biopsies - fortunately that's all it's been. I think at the end of the day it's all about attitude! And, I love yours!
Thanks, Sue, Tabitha and George. As you can see, I've strayed away from my blog for a bit. Life pulled me back to the beginnings of the school year, my novel and the many things going on with my kids. How lucky am I? It's all a bonus, that's for sure!
OMG, I just read this now...when stressed, my internal thoughts say "all things for a reason"....That's where I usually go...
I am so glad you are fine. The scare will stay hidden in the back of your mind for awhile. But trust you are in good hands, and know you are loved!
xxx
Gael, hey there! I was amazed to see that a few of your followers are people I follow and who follow me from time to time. What an incredibly small world it is. And I can say I met you before we knew we were bloggers! Yes, I had dinner with Gael, just a few days ago. How fortunate I am! So glad we had that workshop experience together. Let's keep encouraging one another onward, whatever it is God is calling us to.
I could feel your fear. I went through a visit with my mom where it was the real thing. So glad you had nothing!
I think Sue is right, you have a great attitude.
Roxane, I love your encouraging words! I'm back to my novel and more inspired than ever, because of you! I can only think that our time together at Boyd's Mill had to have a good reason for sure!
And JeMa, how hard that must've been for you. I have also walked the walk with my sister, and unfortunately she was not as lucky as me. Good health is a definite gift, one we should cherish every day!
Oh, Gael, I'm so sorry for your scare, but relieved it was just that. Take care.
And thanks for your (blog) visit the other day. It was good to see you again! :)
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